Ah yes, it was…some time ago, I don’t bother to look up the date (detectives are…suspicious of people interested in the event). I used to…wander the Alaskan Wilderness. I was self sufficient, between hunting, woodwork, and…a few other skills, I was able to feed and shelter myself. Unfortunately, things in your civilization changed, land became…protected, and claimed by your government. I happened to wander onto a “National Park” during my wanderings. Your rangers did not appreciate my…efficient molding of nature to my needs. I apparently committed what your rangers described as…”the wanton destruction of trees on a National Reserve.” After appearing in court, they…tried to arrest me. I fled, still in suit and hat. I was on the run from the law.
I was chased relentlessly. Eventually, I found myself in the center of a…tightening coil of officers on my position. I came across a communications line. There was a thunderstorm that day, an extremely…rare occurrence in that part of the world. By sheer coincidence, lightning struck the line as I neared it, and I was engulfed, suit, axe, and all.